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Brave Hubby

January 13, 2011 post

There were three guys talking in the pub. Two of them are talking about the amount of control they have over their wives, while the third remains quiet.

After a while one of the first two turns to the third and says,

“Well, what about you, what sort of control do you have over your wife?”

The third fellow says “I’ll tell you. Just the other night my wife came to me on her hands and knees.”

The first two guys were amazed. “What happened then?” they asked. “She said, ‘get out from under the bed and fight like a man’.”

Facebook dismisses shutting down rumours

January 11, 2011 post

Facebook has dismissed rumors that the social networking site is shutting down, after millions of its users got panicked.

“We didn’t get the memo about shutting down, so we’ll keep working away. We aren’t going anywhere; we’re just getting started,” the New York Daily News quoted Facebook as tweeting.

The Internet rumour was sparked by a report from a website, Weekly World News.

According to their story, the social media giant would shut down in March because Mark Zuckerberg was getting too stressed out.

Facebook has gotten out of control and the stress of managing this company has ruined my life,” the newspaper quoted Zuckerberg as allegedly saying at a press conference in California.

The questionable story sent Facebook users into a panic. The phrase “Is Facebook shutting down” was the 14th most searched for on Google on Saturday and the 10th most as of Sunday morning.

COST MANAGEMENT

January 10, 2011 post

A PERSON was ILL..

DAY 1 A fellow advised HIM TO go to a DOCTOR

DAY 2 THE FELLOW AGAIN advised him to visit a DOCTOR,
he nodded with an unpleasant smile..

DAY 3 STILL, HE WAS ILL N he did not go to the DOCTOR.

THE ILL PERSON Came n asked THE FELLOW how much would the doctor cost him?

The FELLOW replied not more than 5$

the ILL person asked him how much will it cost him if he dies..

The FELLOW looked at him and said around 2$

The ill person replied *_”I SHALL DIE , THEN”_*

Friendship

January 10, 2011 post

Its easy to take our friendship,
and each other for granted-
to forget what life would be like,
without each other to laugh with,
to be with, to care about…. But
whenever I slow down and give our
Friendship a thought,
I still feel that… its one of the
finest relationship I have and I still
see the same sentiment reflecting in you!!!

Taxes!!!

January 6, 2011 post

A little boy wanted Rs.50 very badly and prayed for
weeks, but nothing
happened. Finally he decided to write God a letter
requesting the Rs.50.
When the postal authorities received the letter
addressed to God,
they decided to forward it to the President as a joke.

The President was so amused, that he instructed his
secretary to send
the little boy Rs.20 . The President thought this would
appear to be a
lot of money to a little boy, and he did not want to
spoil the kid. The
little boy was delighted with Rs.20 , and decided to
write a thank you
note to God, which read:

“Dear God: Thank you very much for sending the money.
However, I noticed
that you sent it through the Government officials, and those
donkeys deducted Rs.30 in taxes …”

if restaurants were run like microsoft

January 5, 2011 post

Patron: Waiter!

Waiter: Hi, my name is Bill, and I’ll be your Support Waiter. What seems to be the problem?

Patron: There’s a fly in my soup!

Waiter: Try again, maybe the fly won’t be there this time.

Patron: No, it’s still there.

Waiter: Maybe it’s the way you’re using the soup; try eating it with a fork instead.

Patron: Even when I use the fork, the fly is still there.

Waiter: Maybe the soup is incompatible with the bowl; what kind of bowl are you using?

Patron: A SOUP bowl!

Waiter: Hmmm, that should work. Maybe it’s a configuration problem; how was the bowl set up?

Patron: You brought it to me on a saucer; what has that to do with the fly in my soup?!

Waiter: Can you remember everything you did before you noticed the fly in your soup?

Patron: I sat down and ordered the Soup of the Day!

Waiter: Have you considered upgrading to the latest Soup of the Day?

Patron: You have more than one Soup of the Day each day??

Waiter: Yes, the Soup of the Day is changed every hour.

Patron: Well, what is the Soup of the Day now?

Waiter: The current Soup of the Day is tomato.

Patron: Fine. Bring me the tomato soup, and the check. I’m running late now.

Waiter leaves and returns with another bowl of soup and the check.

Waiter: Here you are, Sir. The soup and your check.

Patron: This is potato soup.

Waiter: Yes, the tomato soup wasn’t ready yet.

Patron: Well, I’m so hungry now, I’ll eat anything.

Waiter leaves.

Patron: Waiter! There’s a gnat in my soup!

The check:

Soup of the Day …………………………….. $5.00
Upgrade to newer Soup of the Day ………. $2.50
Access to support …………………………… $1.00

Will the map of India change in 2011?

January 5, 2011 post

It’s been a decade since the last time the map of India changed. Whether it will change again depends on how the central government handles the demand for a separate state of Telangana.

And on that depends whether the map will change again (trifurcating Uttar Pradesh?) and again (bifurcating Maharashtra?) and again (a new state in the north-east?).

Activists of Telangana Joint Action Committee shout slogans as they form a human chain during a protest in front of the Charminar in the southern Indian city of Hyderabad February 3, 2010. The protest was held to demand a new state to be carved in southern Indian state of Andhra Pradesh, the activists said on Wednesday.

The Srikrishna committee report is to be made public on Jan 6. Media reports suggest it will not take a definite for/against position. Moreover, the panel’s terms of reference were focused on Andhra Pradesh.

In the long run, more important than what the govt does with the report is how it goes about creating, rejecting or conceding a new state.

A piecemeal response, depending on how violently a movement garners attention, may only encourage similar politically motivated demands.

There is an argument for a more thought-out, streamlined, reasoned process through a new states reorganisation panel. There are various arguments for and against creating smaller states.

But none of them seem to be clinching in practice, so varied has been the experience of going from 500 plus princely states to the 29 at present.

The creation of Andhra Pradesh in the 1950s set off country-wide state reorganisation based on ‘one state, one language’.

But the only thing proven so far is that states created on the basis of language are not inimical to the country’s unity as was initially feared.

If a Telangana state is created, it will be a first again.

For the first time, a non-Hindi speaking group — speakers of Telugu — will be broken down into two sub-national political entities.

This, on the face of it, privileges the question of development over identity, like the results of the Bihar elections in 2010.

Can the change in India’s internal map mark another beginning? Or will short-term considerations rule?

Think Of Those That Love You

January 3, 2011 post

If someone should hurt you
and say a thing unkind,
Remember what I write you,
and keep these thoughts in mind.

For everyone that makes you cry,
there are three who make you smile.
And a smile will last a long, long time,
but a tear just a little while.

Don’t let someone who hates the world
cause you to hate it too.
Behind the clouds is a golden sun,
and a sky that’s full of blue.

If someone said a thing that’s cruel,
don’t let it get to you,
Your achievements are greatly numbered,
and your faults are very few.

So if a certain person should act a certain way,
Think of those who love you and don’t let it spoil your day.

Attitude matters

January 3, 2011 post

An old man lived alone in Minnesota . He wanted to spade his potato garden, but it was very hard work. His only son, who would have helped
him, was in prison. The old man wrote a letter to his son and mentioned his situation:

Dear Son,
I am feeling pretty bad because it looks like I won’t be able to plant my potato garden this year. I hate to miss doing the garden, because your mother always loved planting time.

I’m just getting too old to be digging up a garden plot. If you were here, all my troubles would be over. I know you would dig the plot for me, if you weren’t in prison.

Love,
Dad

Shortly, the old man received this telegram:

For Heaven’s sake, Dad, don’t dig up the garden!! That’s where I buried the GUNS!!

At 4 a.m. the next morning, a dozen police officers showed up and dug up the entire garden without finding any guns.

Confused, the old man wrote another note to his son telling him what happened, and asked him what to do next.

His son’s reply was: ‘Go ahead and plant your potatoes, Dad, It’s the best I could do for you from here.’


Moral:

NO MATTER WHERE YOU ARE IN THE WORLD, IF YOU HAVE DECIDED TO DO SOMETHING DEEP FROM YOUR HEART YOU CAN DO IT. IT HAS ALWAYS BEEN THE THOUGHT THAT MATTERS…

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